Missing You
by CindyBarnard
Summary: Written for a Starrnobella prompt idea: Snow. Misery. Marshmallow. "Are you with me because I remind you of him?" "Everything reminds me of him." DMHG - TNHG


**_A/N: Written for the Starrnobella Prompt idea:_**

 _Snow, misery, Marshmallow_

 _"_ _Are you with me because I remind you of him?" "Everything reminds me of him."_

 _-This is un-beta'd, so any mistakes are my own-_

 ** _Missing You_**

The footsteps were silent as the cloaked woman trudged through the snow; leaving deep imprints behind. She arrived at her destination with a deep sigh and knocked, breaking the silence of the street. She could have Floo'd, or even apparated closer, but she wanted to do the journey through the snow. It reminded her of _him._ Everything from the paleness right to the memories it brought up. It was the late afternoon of Christmas Eve, which brought along its own memories as well. The door cracked open to show a small elf peeking through.

Upon recognising the cloaked witch the elf smiled widely and creaked the old door open more widely. Upon exchanging the usual greeting to the elf she handed her cloak over and made her way to the study. Once there she took a deep, fortifying breath and quietly opened the door and stepped inside.

The room was only illuminated by the roaring fire in the fireplace, burning almost as high as her. She swept the room and her eyes landed on the armchair in front of the fire, the familiar wizard sitting there was watching her with a guarded expression. The witch gave a tentative smile.

"Should have known you would come today –" The wizard spoke drily but he didn't shift his position at all.

She walked silently to kneel in front of the armchair, taking the hands of the man between her own. She began pressing urgent kisses to his hands, over his palms, his fingertips. The wizard only continued to watch her with his hooded eyes until he gently extracted his hands from her hold and fervent kisses. The witch looked up at him with surprised eyes, he never rejected her before.

"I – I don't understand Theo?" The witch kept her wide brown eyes locked to his in confusion.

Theo Nott raked a weary hand through his hair then motioned for the curly-haired witch to sit on the other armchair next to his. "Sit down, we need to talk."

The witch stood up and sat down on the twin chair next to him, yet turned her body sideways to watch him, her own eyes now a bit more cloaked.

Theo studied her in silence for a loaded minute, and then his voice sounded tiredly. "Are you with me because I remind you of him?"

The witch's shoulders slumped with that, she sagged back to lean heavily into the armchair. For the longest time, the heavy silence reigned supreme; Theo was just about to speak again as he thought she wasn't going to answer. But then her voice sounded, small and exhausted.

"Everything reminds me of him –"

Theo studied her face for a few minutes, letting the warmth of the roaring fire cast a golden glow on her countenance. She was beautiful. Beautiful but broken, and he couldn't put her back together. He finally knew that now, and along with that knowledge he knew what he needed to do.

"You need to go. I cannot be his replacement; you need to find a more healthy way to do this." His voice was firm showing his resolution to his decision.

Her mouth opened in shock, "Theo –"

"No. Go home, Hermione. I'm sure there is someone there that is waiting for his Christmas Eve toasted marshmallows." Hermione searched his eyes.

He was right. She was only here because he reminded her of _him_. She loved Theo, but as a friend and she shouldn't have been sleeping with him, to begin with since _he_ left her. She smiled weakly at the best friend of her husband and then with an affirmative nod she pushed herself up. Stepping over she bent over to plant a soft kiss on his forehead. "You're right… I must go… good luck Theo. I will see you around –"

Theo didn't respond, only nodded and turned his gaze to stare once more into the golden fire. Hermione saw the pull of his mouth and knew he was hiding some sadness at this farewell. But Theo would never back from a decision once made. It was one of the attributes that he had in common with her husband. With the thought of her husband, she felt her eyes prickle, as always any thought of him had the power to have her succumb to an emotional wreck. Without another word said, she turned – and this time used his floo – and returned to the home she had known for the last six years.

Stepping through the floo she was welcomed with small arms that enclosed around her thighs, smiling, she picked up the child. "Mummy… you're back!"

She kissed and hugged the boy close to her, breathing in his scent. How could she have left him on this day of all days? They had a Christmas Eve tradition to do! Hermione let her eyes hover on the calendar against the wall, _24 December 2009_. But, they had to visit her husband first as he needed to see his son. She had kept their son away from him too long.

As she walked out of the study with her son to get him dressed, she saw her parents in law as they watched quietly from the shadows in the hallway. Hermione gave them a quiet nod which they returned imperceptibly. It reminded her briefly that her husband had left all of them and not just her.

DMHG

The cloaked witch and boy trudged together through the thick snow, leaving a twin trail of prints behind, a small pair and a big pair. Finally, they reached the wrought iron gate that opened up into the family graveyard. With a heavy heart, Hermione counted the steps to the newest grave. Each step caused her heart to thud heavily in time; the boy that held onto her hand was eerily quiet. He knew this was special; he had only been here on the day of the funeral.

Moisture leaked from her eyes as she kneeled in front of the ornate gravestone, a sob lodging in her throat as she wiped the frost from the script plate.

The boy remained quiet for a long time while Hermione sat staring at the name while tears ran unchecked down her cheeks. Finally, the boy placed the single white rose he held on the ground. "We miss you, daddy… I will toast you a marshmallow tonight –"

Hermione pulled her son close and hugged him tightly, she felt the wetness of the snow dampening her cloak where she kneeled but it didn't bother her. She was just happy to hold her son to her and remembering the good memories. Memories of them toasting marshmallows every Christmas eve in their suites, memories of goodnight kisses and stories, of snow fights and snow angels. So many memories… Memories of playful sarcasm and bantering… of forgiveness and new beginnings. Second chances. Second chances that she would never regret as it led to her getting to know the love of her life.

Her cheeks still cold and wet from the silent tears, she released her son to lay down her own white rose.

"I miss you so much… everyday… And I promise to do this better from now on. I will always love you –"

Her voice was soft in the twilight, a longing in it that the five-year-old boy was too young to understand. But he knew that his mummy was sad, and that was all he needed to know. But he also knew his mummy was happy with him, so he would toast her a marshmallow too. After another few minutes of silence, Hermione stood up finally. With a last longing look at the gravestone, she took her son's hand and led him from the family graveyard plot and back up the snow covered path to the Manor. "Come on Scorp… let's go ask grandma and grandpa if they want to toast marshmallows with us this year –"

The sound of their voices dimmed off along with the crunching of their footsteps as silence descended once more on this lonely corner of the Manor grounds. Darkness washed over the earth as a stray moonbeam flickered through the barren trees to light on the plate on the headstone of the grave that held two white roses.

 **Draco Lucius Malfoy**

 _b. 5 June 1980_

 _d. 24 December 2008_

 _Beloved Son_

 _Devoted Father_

 _Fiercely Loved Husband_

 _"_ _I love you more today than yesterday… and I'll love you more tomorrow than today."_

 **The End**


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